Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

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Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  alec eiffel on Sun Sep 18, 2011 9:11 pm

I know we've touched on feeling a bit isolated or lonely on other threads so I was wondering if you're the only stay at home person you know or do you have friends in the same boat as you? I know a few SAH mums but that's mainly via the internet. All of my friends are career women.

Having said that it's still easy to talk to them about things as they often like cooking - having dinner parties and stuff and are interested in the idea of crafting, making stuff and things like that but it's not a priority. So they do say occasionally that they'd love to have an afternoon to sit down and create things but weekends are taken up with cleaning, shopping and working so there's really no quiet time to just focus on anything else.

How about you? Have you met people through having children, via the internet, groups you attend or just in daily life. Or are you the maverick that stands alone? Interested to hear your thoughts and stories.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  lollyfin on Sun Sep 18, 2011 10:27 pm

I am the only SAHM i know everyone else works full or part time
I dont actually know anyone else who likes knitting and making things either (apart from my mum)
Thinking about it, and this sounds awful, but most of the people i know appear to be quite materialistic more interested in working to buy things than making stuff or cutting back to have a simpler life. I am really proud of my kids as they have more than once come home and said "so and so has got a (insert expensive brand name) jacket/jumper/bag i dont understand why they spent that much money on it its a waste"
I would love to meet people like me in real life (IYKWIM) so we could sit down and have a cuppa and a chat about making things easier and simpler and share recipes and skills
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  cat_smith on Sun Sep 18, 2011 11:11 pm

This is my MAJOR problem. All the local SAH are mums, and I am just not into children/the childrens timetable. Need to find some part-time stay at homes who do it out of choice/necessity not children, but are my age (early 30's) Not really happening at the moment.
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  alec eiffel on Sun Sep 18, 2011 11:14 pm

Hi Cat,

Ikwym, I'm childfree and it can be tough. So if I do talk to anyone who stays at home it's generally because of children so lots of the conversation is child centered and I'm kind of out of the loop there and not really what I want to talk about.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  lollyfin on Sun Sep 18, 2011 11:56 pm

I honestly dont know if it is "socially acceptable" yet to be at home because you want to be rather than being forced due to unemployment/illness/tiny children/ other reasons and it is such a shame
I would have loved to have been a housewife in the 40's or 50's or even before then where it was more acceptable and loads more people did it and i think were more appreciated for doing it.
I have been at home for a year and a half and am still feeling pressure from myself and other people (except OH) to get back out there and work even tho we are very lucky and financially i no longer have to.
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  alec eiffel on Mon Sep 19, 2011 12:01 am

I'd don't think I'd go so far as to want to go back to the 40's and 50's, I enjoy the rights and the gadgets too much!

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  lollyfin on Mon Sep 19, 2011 1:14 am

I agree with you there i would miss my gadget too!
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  knitmylife on Mon Sep 19, 2011 1:47 am

apart from my mother no i dont know any either.

all my friends work at least part time so certainly wouldnt be available to play of i was at home all the time.

having said that i love my friends dearly and they all like to bake although none of them craft. we do all share a love of books too so we have great times. we all (bar one) have children too so have that in common too.

i work 25 hours a week at the moment but am hoping by next september to drop at least one day a week and eventually two days a week allowing me more at home time.

i would love to see more of my parents (who are retired) and get chores out of the way during the week. i hate food shopping on a saturday morning xx
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  TP on Mon Sep 19, 2011 7:55 pm

I think i probably know a mixture of people.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  mesh on Mon Sep 19, 2011 10:33 pm


Hello

where I live, most of the mums are full time workers and my mates are in busy jobs all bar one who has 4 kiddies under 4!! and she also looks after her parents. Like some of you, I have no children and whilst I like to hear about them some of the time, I would prefer more adult stimulation. In the high street a sort of 'crafty' shop has opened up and I am going to toddle round there this week to see if there are any crafty circles to join in. I have tried the card class and it was, unfortunately, full of older ladies whom I didnt think were particularly nice about each other behind their backs.

Just got some wool from a charity shop still in wrappers 2 for 50p (bought 9 balls which was all they had) and got a couple of crochet hooks so am going to have a go at crocheting some dishcloths when I find a pattern. Havent crochets for years so this will keep me quiet for a day or two...

Also want to have a go at rag rug making (always wanted to and never got round to it) so am collecting supplies and will have a go in the wet weather which will surely come.

Tried the line dancing club and turfed out because its for over 55's! I am 50 couldnt they make an exception???

So yes, sometime I do feel a bit isolated but hey, I use this as thinking time and problem solution time but it would be good to have a fellow female to chat with over crafting........
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  TP on Mon Sep 19, 2011 10:52 pm

i guess you have heard of the u3a?

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  froogs on Tue Sep 20, 2011 8:19 pm

A mum at the school gate who is fast becoming my friend is also a full-time mum and homemaker. She is feeling the pressure to get out to work now though as her youngest is at nursery but is resisting as the childcare will still be an expensive nightmare.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  alec eiffel on Tue Sep 20, 2011 8:22 pm

There was a phone in last week on the radio about the cost of childcare. I was astounded by how much some people were having to pay.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  froogs on Tue Sep 20, 2011 8:27 pm

I can honestly see myself being at home until my little ones are 14 etc, so I know they could cope for an hour on their own of an evening because I can't see how I could find anyone to look after my eldest once she gets passed 8. Plus the cost.. if I put my two into breakfast and after school clubs it would cost just over £500 per month. That's more than our rent for a couple of hours childcare a day Shocked No job is worth me getting.
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  alec eiffel on Tue Sep 20, 2011 8:32 pm

Wow!

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  froogs on Tue Sep 20, 2011 8:37 pm

yip,

£4.50 for the morning session
£8.50 for the afternoon session

= £13 per day
= £65 per week
= £260 per month

x2 children £520 per month. A scary amount of money.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  TP on Tue Sep 20, 2011 8:57 pm

maybe you will be able to find something from home.

Agree childcare costs are scary never had any here when ds was younger.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  stiltwalker on Thu Sep 22, 2011 7:13 am

I have a friend in the village who only works 2 days a week and homeschools her 2 the rest of the time (her OH homeschools the days she works) and we try to catch up at least once a fortnight. Me and the kids quite often go to homeschool meets as although DD a bit young yet she gets more out of the contact with the older kids than her peers because of her mobility issues and DS is popular for the game of pass the baby! I'm slowly getting to know the (mainly) mums there better and obviously they all stay home but do tend to be busy. There's also another SAHM on our little street who I've got to know quite well. My little brov was a SAHD til the end of last year but unfortunately they live much too far away to get together. Sometimes I think it'd be nice to have more SAH friends but then again between normal kid stuff plus DD's appointments and Monday group, I'd not really have enough time.
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  TP on Tue Oct 11, 2011 1:52 am

I have also put in the forum title that we are for stay at home wanabees. It would be nice to attract some members who want to be at home but arent. We can answer any questions about being at home. you know any point them this way. Smile

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  flibsey on Wed Oct 12, 2011 3:08 am

I know a few, but most people I know are mostly home-bodies, but with part time jobs. m friend Leah cuts hair and does a bit of cleaning while her kids are both at school or while her hubby is home. Hazel is a Provident Loans collector while her child is at school, Hayley works weekends as a carer while her ex husband has the kids.

For me hubby has odd shifts and I don't drive, so anything paid I'd be able to take on would have to be walking distance form this house and during school hours but also be flexible as sophie has recurrent tonsillitis as a part of a possibly genetic complaint... ugggggh!!!
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  TP on Mon Nov 14, 2011 10:53 pm

ladies if you do come across anyone you think would like to join our lovely forum please spread the word.

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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  flibsey on Mon Nov 14, 2011 11:55 pm

I have, but none of them seem interested. it seems I'm the only internet addict in our little group!
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Re: Do You Know Other Housewives/ SAH people?

Post  TP on Tue Nov 15, 2011 12:06 am

he he there must be more addicts out there we just have to find them Wink

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